(Something I think about every single day!)
There’s an amazing Matt Damon quote, where he’s reflecting on what he learned from winning an Oscar at the age of just 27.
It’s not a very snappy quote! Here it is in full: “Imagine chasing that, and not getting it…finally in your 80s or your 90s with all of life behind you…and realizing what an unbelievable waste of your…you know what I mean? …If that’s a hole that you have, that won’t fill it. I felt so blessed to have that awareness at 27… My heart literally broke for a second. I imagined another one of me…an old man…‘Oh my god, where did my life go? What have I done?’ And then it’s over.”
Here’s a snappier version:
“Thank God I won my Oscar at 27… so I didn’t waste my life chasing glory only to then realise it doesn’t fill the hole.”
Matt Damon didn’t say it, but I wish he did, because then this Linkedin post would be much shorter.
I think about this a lot regarding my own kids.
The danger of accidentally signalling to them that it’s the glory that matters.
It’s subtle, this stuff!
It’s about the little things we notice, praise and comment on.
So I’ve been trying to shift. Not just what I say, but actually how I think.
Little changes…
— From “Push yourself” to “Notice your energy.”
— From “Make me proud” to “What are you proud of?”
These mindset shifts take work!
Most of us were raised to chase trophies, and to believe that rest is laziness, quitting is failure, and joy is optional. It’s a total trap.
And the more successful you’ve been in life, the more you might fall into it.
I feel like I spent the first half of my life learning how to win trophies, and the second half of my life unlearning it.
But I don’t want that for my kids.
I don’t want them to turn 40 and THEN figure out that they’re allowed joy.
I want them to know that their aliveness matters more than their achievement, right NOW.
Luckily, it is possible to break out of this. You just need to be deliberate about it.
The carousel below shows you how.
